How to Be Alone...?

My soul is tired.  my hope is faltering.  my contentment is beyond reach. 

          and the loneliness seeps in like floods waters into a well protected basement.


Things that I used to find comfort in don't do it anymore:

"If you're happy in you're head, then solitude is blessed and alone is o.k."

          But, I'm not happy in my head.  Alone is not o.k.  I'm sick of solitude.  That's all I know.  I just want to be loved.  Is that too much to ask?

"If you're heart is bleeding, make the best of it.  There is heat in freezing, be a testament."

          But, I'm tired of freezing.  I'm sick of being a testament.  I don't want to make the best of it. This is ridiculous and pathetic and I hate that I feel this way this week of all weeks.  I'm fine.  I'm fine.  I'm fine.

I'm fine?